I hope he gets to the knife quicker than I did.

Also tell him when the rounds kids come around and one of them pipes up about there being a jug of water beyond his reach and making a snide remark about nil by mouth to reach DEEP and ask them 'how am I meant to reach that? and if I am not meant to get anything orally perhaps you could prescribe me some IV painkillers instead of the paracetamol and then codeine that the REAL doctors have prescribed me.'

I was too fucking tired and in pain to do anything except murmur 'fuck you kid'.